“He’ll Fertilize the Rice in China with the Cinders of his Remains” – Steve Albini

Album: 1000 Hurts
Artist: Shellac (of North America)
Year: 2000
Genre: Minimalist Rock/Math Rock
Label: Touch & Go

In 1983, Sting wrote a song about stalking his ex-girlfriend in order to get back at her. In 2000, Steve Albini wrote a song about asking God to kill both his ex and her new boy for him. He was very specific; his ex was to die quietly and painlessly, while her new man was to die painfully and pathetically, like a dog or a fish (my words not his.) Why he couldn’t have done it himself is obvious if you know anything about the man. Acclaimed producer, musician, critic and all-around sarcastic asshole, Steve Albini is just too important to modern music to go to jail. I’m not joking either. Looking at his track record, Albini has lead some extremely influential and confrontational groups over the years. Way back in the 80’s he was the man behind Big Black, a noise rock band that wrote songs about things like getting a “Colombian Necktie” (which is where your throat is cut from ear to ear and your tongue hangs out, pleasant huh?) At some point or another in the late 80’s, Albini also started producing records for other bands and has been doing so ever since. After Big Black disbanded, he formed Rapeman (I think that’s all that needs be said.) Following that band’s dissolution, he formed Shellac.

Shellac is a trio consisting of Albini (Guitar,) Bob Weston (Bass) and Todd Trainer (Drums.) On this album, 1000 Hurts, Albini proves that years of successful independent music work, from producing bands like the Pixies to Nirvana, has not improved his mood any since the 80’s. Songs like “Prayer to God” and “Watch Song” reveal that rather then choosing to simply horrify people with horrifying things (something anyone can do,) Albini would rather vent his rage and aggression in a very frank, if sarcastic, manner. It’s probably good that he wrote songs about these things (murder, assault, battery,) rather than actually committing them. Now, I’m all for random violence (I say sarcastically,) but attacking someone because your watch is beeping like mad is excessive. Anyway, between those songs lie the rest of the album, each track powerful and metallic, and I don’t mean in a heavy metal sense. Rather, it seems like everything is made out of metal (which it may well be, Albini plays a guitar made out of aluminum.)

It’s also interesting to note that, Albini isn’t the only one who sings on this album. Trainer, their drummer also sings as well. Weston even wrote at least one song on the album, “Shoe Song” which, if I’m not mistaken is the least threatening song on the album. The whole affair is very enjoyable piece of pure Albini production and execution, with “Canaveral” being my favorite and Weston’s “Song against Itself” also being a fun one. If you’re looking for the raw noise blast of Big Black, it’s not here. This is more intricate; rather than a pavement saw, it’s a fine drill bit. Still, be careful with it, or it’ll cut you somewhere.